Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
