its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
