Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize