TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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