Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
