so let's talk penis.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
