the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
