My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
