Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize