So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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