I was born with a shot glass in my hand
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
you win again, gameday.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
