Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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