i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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