i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
