Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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