mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
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