I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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