No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
