it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
