Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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