Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
