Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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