Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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