areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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