That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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