i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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