JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Why is your signature on my underwear?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
