Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
