the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Randomize
