he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
