ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
