i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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