did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
