awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
