he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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