The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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