How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize
