Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Randomize
