I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
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