i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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