I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
