Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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