They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Barsexuality is the new black.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
