oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
