i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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