Texts From Last Night

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  (734): View more from Michigan

  she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords

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  (734): she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords http://tfl.nu/o43m
  Replies (2) Good night (1195) Bad night (505) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off

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  (818): Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off http://tfl.nu/wsi1
  Replies (8) Good night (2958) Bad night (461) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.

  (207): View more from Maine

  sorry im really high

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  (207): You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage. (207): sorry im really high http://tfl.nu/3k8n
  Replies (11) Good night (932) Bad night (1550)
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  (786): View more from Florida

  my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao

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  (786): my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao http://tfl.nu/rabe
  Replies (38) Good night (1318) Bad night (6966) Order T-Shirt
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it

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  (810): I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it http://tfl.nu/y92b
  Replies (81) Good night (5443) Bad night (1123) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell

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  (615): jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell http://tfl.nu/zqhf
  Replies (51) Good night (1255) Bad night (3430) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.

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  (518): Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help. http://tfl.nu/q9on
  Replies (39) Good night (638) Bad night (8972) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.

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  (775): Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/8nek
  Replies (11) Good night (2368) Bad night (1585) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?

  (1-614): View more from Ohio

  Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.

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  (614): Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast? (1-614): Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry. http://tfl.nu/0ygg
  Replies (3) Good night (605) Bad night (1042)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.

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  (914): Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why. http://tfl.nu/2wlq
  Replies (4) Good night (1001) Bad night (316) Order T-Shirt
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.

  (574): View more from Indiana

  No I didn't. Whiskey did.

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  (765): You wore a man's plastic top hat last night. (574): No I didn't. Whiskey did. http://tfl.nu/63th
  Replies (5) Good night (1666) Bad night (385)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.

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  (608): We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you. http://tfl.nu/0tab
  Replies (7) Good night (1060) Bad night (288)
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  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music

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  (787): They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music http://tfl.nu/mg50
  Replies (9) Good night (1166) Bad night (241) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup

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  (513): Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup http://tfl.nu/jbl9
  Replies (1) Good night (497) Bad night (243) Order T-Shirt
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.

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  (903): Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell. http://tfl.nu/clzb
  Replies (3) Good night (379) Bad night (175) Order T-Shirt

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