Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize
