I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Randomize
