RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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