Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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